A nailbiter in Guildford

Sunday 15th May, The Urn Field, Guildford. St Anne's Allstars (171) drew with Sanford (125-9).

By James Terrett

In one of my most enjoyable games of cricket, the Allstars produced a brilliant performance that will be putting uninteresting Sunday afternoon cricket played by 22 random blokes firmly back on the map. This week we were up against Sanford – a new fixture in a packed summer calendar with the team described by the Skipper as “similar in spirit and style to a pub team, and they sound like very nice blokes on the phone.” They were a great bunch of guys and the cricket match proved to be a an excellent competitive battle.

We opened the batting with Tristan Haddow-Allen and me trying to get used to the unpredictable pitch, and extremely accurate opening bowlers. As I ambled out, I could still feel the effects of last night’s Stella impairing my concentration. How I managed to keep out the first two yorkers I’ll never know, but I was pretty hopeless, and dropped twice. We struggled to 25 runs from 13 overs before I was bowled by one that nipped away. I would like to have called it unplayable, but I think we all know I didn’t actually have a clue what I was doing. Tristan was then caught out just after starting to cut loose and after Felix Haddow-Allen’s 40 ball vigil ended with a shooter on to the stumps, we were poised at 30-3 with much to do.

Up stepped St Anne’s very own Andrew Symonds equivalent in the shape of Liam Mulcahy, who set about upping the scoring rate with classy pulls, cuts and drives. Hitting two enormous sixes, he sped along to 53 before charging Tim Ford (who was playing for Sanford) and losing his middle stump. But by then had single-handedly taken the game away from the fielding side. Not to be outdone, Dave Halladay aggressively picked up where Liam had left off and with the superb assistance of first Paul Nicol, and then Chris Hipwell, both attacking well at the other end, we moved past 150 before losing Paul, Chris and then Dave - caught after smashing a brilliant 41 of 30 balls.

Andy Crawford was up next but had no time to play himself in and was caught at mid wicket trying to finish with glory. The tail then arrived, with Garreth Duncan running hard to the last before Ivan Hartley managed his first Allstars runs, only to spectacularly pull a muscle while taking his very first step. The innings ended as usual in comedy, Nick Chadwick asking Ivan to take on a quick single when he could barely walk, and both batsmen were stood at one end with one ball to be bowled before declaration. The highlight of the innings was probably my leading edge back over the bowlers head to get off the mark, although it may have had some tough competition from Liam’s massive six over mid-wicket, almost straight onto the scorers desk.

On that pitch it really was a great batting performance, not just from Liam and Dave but everyone who contributed all the way down the order. With a par score on that pitch of around 140, we excelled. It makes such a difference to the team when we all chip-in, and the vibes were very good at tea. The Skipper as always was deep in thought, contemplating the value of the whitener with his tea, instead of his usual milk.

In a timed format, and with our massive total, we needed wickets. Wickets we needed, wickets we got. Tristan’s first over was beautifully metronomic, if not Glen McGrath like, with his last ball taking the edge and slapping into my gloves. 0-1. Chadders had trouble finding his range to begin with, but at the other end Tristan continued to wreak havoc and scare the new batsman with his accuracy, forcing him to play on. 4-2. Chadders then joined the wicket party, with a delivery straight from the West Indies circa 1978-79. The Hove-based demon bowler sent down a “Malcolm Marshall” style bouncer at the unlucky batsman’s throat, gloving it high in the air for a simple catch behind the stumps. Tristan certainly wasn’t finished either, with a late cut flying straight into Felix’s hands at Gully, the crowd were in raptures. As the whistles and claxons screeched into the summer dusk, Chadders let Sanford know he could do everything with the ball. Sensing fear, he exploited the area outside off-stump and caught the top edge of the bat, flying high into the air. Tristan called instantly and pocketed the skier with ease at first slip. At 29-5 the best opening bowling partnership since Marshall and Holding had done their job, and our excellent catching ensured we took every chance that came our way. What the hell was going on?

To try and open things up, the Skipper rang the changes, with Garreth looping from one end and Andy lolloping in from the other. The few bad balls were put away well, although we all knew another chance was coming soon. Like a sleepy badger, Garreth’s arm seems to have gone into hibernation since last season as he couldn’t quite get the turn he was after, while the well set batsman of Sanford started to find the gaps in the field. As the fielders began to get nervous, the Skipper brought on Paul “Mad-Dog” Nicol to conjure up something from the horse field end. After finding his range Mad Dog bowled a beauty. Brilliantly nipping off the seam, he found the outside edge and the ball absolutely motored into the slip cordon. It is fair to say everyone shat themselves apart from Liam who instantly snatched the ball from the left of his shoulder – one of the greatest catches I have ever seen. Throughout their innings, one Sanford player had been chatting with his girlfriend and was obviously keen to make an impression. Predictably enough his first ball was a jaffer from Mad Dog, and edged straight into my gloves. As he walked back I felt his pain – the only time a girl came to watch me I was out for 0 too, and as Devers would say “I looked like a right ****”. No sympathy however from Mad Dog, as he followed up two balls later with a middle stump yorker which accounted for Tim Ford. One over, three wickets.115-8.

One over later Mad Dog picked up his fourth wicket as Andy took a very good high catch at mid-on, and we only needed one more wicket to win, while Sanford had to survive 11 more overs. I thought it would be a formality, but apart from two chances which astonishingly we didn’t take (unlike everything else that day) Sanford's last two batsmen were superb. 6 consecutive maidens were bowled, but it just wouldn’t go our way. A slightly frustrating end, but a truly great performance with the bat and ball. The highlight of the fielding was definitely Liam’s catch at second slip, which meant he collected the man of the match award with aplomb. As you may have guessed, I was obviously amazing behind the stumps, really amazing.