When I look back on tours I think of the individuals who made it special, the David Boon, Ian Botham and David Gower type characters with their colourful array of stories. I hope that when I remember this tour, it will be with the same fondness regarding the characters - hence this analysis of the 'men of the tour'.

Six Times

Rog demonstrated tremendous strength of character to recover from Pikey airlines' theft of his suitcase on the flight down. When all you've packed is 400 B&H, a jazz mag, hair cream and your cricket shirt it is a trifle unfortunate to have it go missing as it did. Doubty Rog though came through to demonstrate the type of grit that won him all those championships.

Mozza

Mozza is an inspiration with his unique commitment to the Allstars cause. With a brilliant knock on the Friday added to by his match-winning 67 on the Sunday, he was the only batsman to make any mark on tour. This combined with a quick trip to a wedding on the Saturday and a more than competent display with the ball marks him out as a man of outstanding ability and temperament, however these talents mean that he could never win coveted title of 'man of the tour'.

Talksport's very own

I am indebted to Kelvin MacKenzie for his charitable sparing of one of his leading producers to organise the fantastic trip that we were all party to. Quite simply, where would we have been without Maxie? For his good humour in the face of idiocy, disorganisation, ill discipline in the field (from Dolphin) we should all be grateful. Fat Andy for one could learn a thing or two from Maxie about tactics and I personally hope that his was not sufficiently worn-out by the whole experience to forget organising a similar tour next year (but please bring a better suit).

Chris

Performed competently behind the stumps and proved himself a real fighter when on the lash. Crossword prowess was something to behold but let himself down with his leadership of the non-suit wearing faction.

Garreth

Performance on tour was not great except for the comedy value of his part in the stand-up routine of two visually impaired umpires. This is not sour grapes, but one of them (or was it the shoeless wonder) seemed able to give me out lbw?

Bovill

He risked life and limb to make the Allstars the focus of national sporting attention. Sadly did not actually tour.

Clem

Tour merchandise was a revelation. Never again will a touring side be outfitted in quite such panache. Was let down by the grunge element within the team refusing the suited option on the way down. As a note, next year we all need tour bandanas in Allstars colours.

Fat Andy

Bit of a cunt as usual and hardly did himself any favours with ladies or his batting. I'm sure that he will miss the cream teas most of all.

Scorer

Tom extended his scoring skills to golf and pool on tour. His healthy appreciation of fruity bitters and sausages means that we expect to see him migrate South-West in the near future.

Dolphin

Who can forget that first ball pummelled for four runs or his abdication of his wicket to end the innings? Was my roommate, confidant and lover for the duration of the tour.

Tristan

Bowled fairly well to dismiss Trengilly but did not live up to big reputation as a ladies man, indeed, more of a ladyboy.

Jase

Cricket will be adopting a new edge from now on. What team will be without its own pasty eating, bandana wearing heavyweight? Am personally indebted to Jase for his driving and his driving tape.

Jimmy T

Sadly there can only be one winner in this competition and this winner has done it by a country mile. On tour, Mr Terrett embodies everything an Allstar should aspire towards. Few will forget the achievements but just for the record I have noted them down: