16th June 2001 - Barn Elms

All Stars Destroy Damp Rain Men

The rain, a knackered wicket, the world's shortest boundary and the determination of some of the team to spend the afternoon in the nice, dry pub (with beer) instead of a cold, wet cricket pitch still couldn't stop a fine six wicket victory for the All Stars. Most the team arrived at Barn Elms just as three hours of torrential rain was stopping and the sun made an appearance. It was to be all too brief. As 2 o'clock approached, the oppo still hadn't bothered to turn up and it began to rain again. Rain Men managed to find the place at about five to two but after the latest shower, an executive decision was made to head to the Red Lion and wait for the weather to clear. The match was just minutes (and another round of beers) from being abandoned but the skippers got together and decided a 25 overs-a-side game could be played.

As the rain started to pelt down again, the All Stars took to the field. The first 15 overs were spent in a continual downpour but what a start for St Anne's. Rain Men weren't living up to their name and were struggling with the astro-turf pitch. Two early wickets for Tom Morris and a fine run out reduced them to 19 for 3. Joe 'Another Guiness Please' Johnson then got in on the act. A perfect yorker sent the middle stump cartwheeling and Rain Men were in a whole world of trouble at 33 for 4. But by then their 'Big Fella' was set at the crease and he took full advantage of a boundary just 20 yards from the square by bludgeoning 87 from just 65 balls in a fifth wicket stand of 104. He took a particular shine to the spin of Josh Milligan, who finished with figures of 2 overs, no maidens, none for 33! The Big Man was supported by some bloke who didn't know one end of his bat from the other but still managed to defend his wicket, sneaking the odd streaky single into the bargain. Damp and disheartened, some All Star heads went down. But then the breakthrough came from the most unlikely source. Joe Holland, who barely managed to get the ball on the pitch for most of his 10 ball over, snaffled a sublime caught and bowled with his second delivery (sandwiched between two no balls). The Big Fella was gone, Rain Men never recovered their momentum and they completed their innings on 148 for 7.

Another storm then set in for an hour and the game was again close to being abandoned. Rain Men were eventually persuaded to take to the field as the shower started to ease off and the All Stars began their run chase. Tom Morris fell cheaply after a defensive start. Andy Clarke came in at three, brimming with confidence and was looking good when he drove his first ball hard and low over the covers for six. But it wasn't to last and Clarkey was clean bowled two overs later without adding to his score. So it was left to Tristan Haddow-Allen and Andy Dyer to construct the base of the All Stars' victory with a fine stand of 96. Haddow-Allen eventually went for 66 when he gifted his wicket, stumped after an attempted reverse sweep (he even had to point out to the keeper, you have to remove the bails with the ball in order to stump someone). So out walked Joe 'Lead me to the Beer' Johnson. The former Marine showed he hasn't lost his old touch, launching the opposition's grenades with some Howitzer style shots. His 22 from 13 balls saw St Anne's home, although the winning boundary was hit by Nick Jones. Job done, Johnson finally got his wish as the triumphant St Anne's All Stars Invitational XI celebrated a maiden win with more pints of London Pride than was good for them.

Mike Bovill